Dancing On My Own
by DazStar
Summary: Steph doesn't believe the rumours about Ranger and another woman. Then she sees for herself. No HEA ...


Disclaimer: None of these characters belong to me. Neither does the song. Hope You Enjoy!

When I'd first heard the rumours, I had just rolled my eyes and laughed. There's no way that you would flirt or publicly display emotions so publicly. I knew that I had no rights to you, especially when I was always either in a relationship or on a break with Joe. But that little voice in my head truly believed that I was the only woman you ever laid yours eyes, and on those special occasions behind the Bonds Office in the Alley, your rough calloused hands on. The first time I realized I might be wrong was when I'd called you late on a Friday evening. You answered out of breath and wanted to know if I was injured. When I said that I was fine and just wanted to talk, the silence almost killed me. You had sighed and said that you were too busy and would call me later. I had waited nearly four days before I let that deep ache in my chest permission to burn.

_Somebody said you got a new friend  
Does she love you better than I can?  
There's a big black sky over my town  
I know where you're at, I bet she's around_

I first saw the two of you at Shorty's. I had made a spur of the moment decision to go there instead of Pino's and instantly regretted it. At the largest table in the far corner was Tank, Bobby, You and some gorgeous brunette. I don't think anyone noticed me as I stared from the counter. You had your arm slung so gently across her waist and smiled as she seemed to tell a hilarious joke that had the other guys bursting with laughter. You pulled a stray, sleek and shiny, straight strand of brunette hair behind her ears. I think in that very moment my heart shattered into a million pieces. I grab the pizza I had ordered and ran out as fast as I could. I barely made it to my current POS before I broke down into shaking sobs.

_Yeah, I know it's stupid  
I just gotta see it for myself_

I opened the door to the local pub, McGuires, and sat at a table in the back and shuffled to the corner. The waitress, a decent looking blonde, pulled up to my table and eyed me up twice before taking my order.

" Pint of Ale and a shot of tequila." I responded, not even bothering to hide the tears. She nodded and walked away only to quickly return with a pitcher of beer and two shots.

" A woman should never drink away her heartache alone." She responded, answering my unasked question and took a shot with me. I smiled a thank you and she left me with the pitcher. After finishing the first gulp, I sighed. The cool carbonated drink seemed to be exactly what I needed. I had just poured my last glass out of the pitcher when I felt that familiar tingle, making my heart first soar and then sink so quickly when I spotted you walk in with her only right behind you. You stopped once you made eye contact with me and whispered something in her ear. She nodded and sidled up to the bar by herself as you made your way over to me.

I'm in the corner, watching you kiss her, ohh  
I'm right over here, why can't you see me, ohh  
I'm giving it my all, but I'm not the girl you're taking home, ooo  
I keep dancing on my own  
I keep dancing on my own

You took a seat directly opposite me and sat awkwardly. I took a deep breath, inhaling your trademark scent and regretting it instantly, before I made to talk first. My voice seemed only slightly slurred, which was a lucky break for me tonight. " 'Lo Ranger. What's a guy like you doing in a scuzzy joint like this?" A small hiccup and then I looked up into your eyes. You seemed so out of place. You, this handsome and strong guy, sitting opposite a fool.  
"You're no fool, Babe. Don't think like that." Ah, so I was drunk enough to talk instead of think and this whole situation made me laugh. What was I doing sitting here moping about the love of my life when I made no move to fight for him or show him. He shows up with this gorgeous girl and then I get jealous? I laughed out loud before catching myself. To prevent further humiliation, I reached for my beer and took a large gulp.

"I came to check up on you. You seemed pretty quiet and avoiding the guys lately. Lester said you walked right by him yesterday." His coal-like eyes seemed to be trying to look right through me as he awaited an answer. Had I been sober, this conversation would've gone a lot better. I could've saved face and been aloof and witty. But considering that I should've been cut off two drinks ago, I had no chance.

"Didn't think you'd notice Ranger. What with your new squeeze. I'm surprised that you'd be so brazen with her around town, normally I'd peg you for a reserved kinda guy and keep your flings undercover." The words came out sounding as close to a jealous and obsessive girlfriend as possible. Only I could taste the venom of the words as they left my mouth. All the hurt and anger that I'd felt these passed few months seemed to surface at once and suddenly I was pissed off at him.

_I'm just gonna dance all night  
I'm all messed up, I'm so out of line  
Stilettos and broken bottles  
I'm spinning around in circles_

His back straightened and his eyes turned an angry obsidian before he moved to stand. He turned around brought his face closer to mine.

"What angers you more Stephanie, the fact that I have been seeing someone or the fact that it's while you're currently not with Morelli? Did you think I was going to sit around like a little puppy dog and wait for you to say "Good Boy" and give me a treat? I`m only a man Stephanie. I need to feel flesh under me, just as you do. Don`t play as if you thought I`d stay home every night just waiting for you to pick me. Good Night Stephanie.`` He walked up to the bar where the brunette stood, and directed her out of the bar by placing a hand on her lower back. He made no effort to look back and I slouched back into the booth.

_I'm just gonna dance all night  
I'm all messed up, I'm so out of line  
Stilettos and broken bottles  
I'm spinning around in circles_

Time seemed to flow by quickly after that, and the women seemed to change every few weeks. I never did see him with the same one twice, but he also didn`t seem to be making a habit of bringing them out everywhere he went. He made to avoid me now, instead of the other way around, and I actually appreciated it. Joe had just proposed to one of the Nurses he`d met on several of my many hospital visits, Nurse Nancy Kwazowski, and I couldn`t be happier for him. We had met up at Pino`s to celebrate his engagement, sharing a large pizza and a pitcher of beer. It was then that I felt that familiar tingle on the back of my neck and looked up to see Ranger staring at us. I looked from him to Joe and realised that he probably assumed we were back together. To avoid any gossip, I leaned over a bit and called to him.

_I'm in the corner, watching you kiss her, ohh  
I'm right over here, why can't you see me, ohh  
I'm giving it my all, but I'm not the girl you're taking home, ooo  
I keep dancing on my own  
I keep dancing on my own_

`Hey Ranger, Joe and I are celebrating his engagement to Nancy. Care to join us?" Joe smiled and waved him over. Ranger just shook his head,

"Sorry, I wish I could. Just doing a quick pick-up for Poker Night. Congratulations, though, Joe. I hope you and Nancy a very happy marriage." And with that and a nod in my direction, he was gone. Joe and I switched to silence as we ate our pizza.

"So ... now that it's official and everything ... Do you think you and Ranger will be getting together?" I knew this question was coming, and moved my chewing to a slower rate, knowing I'd need as much time to come up with the right answer.

"Uh, no. Ranger and I are just very good friends. You know that, He knows that ... and Now, now I know that." I reached for the last slice of pizza before he could and he glared at me from across the table.

"But you look at one another like only your eyes would be needed to get each other naked and have hours of crazy gorilla sex."

I laughed bitterly and looked out the window just in time to see his car speeding off into the street before returning my attention back to Joe. "He's not a relationship kinda guy and I'm not a fuck-and-chuck kinda girl. We make good friends, but I\m afraid that's all Joe. But thanks for trying to make sure I'm happy. I appreciate it."

_I'm in the corner, watching you kiss her, ohh  
I'm right over here, why can't you see me, ohh  
I'm giving it my all, but I'm not the girl you're taking home, ooo  
I keep dancing on my own  
I keep dancing on my own  
_

I only ever saw the occasional glimpses of him afterwards. The next time I had a real conversation with him was actually at Joe's Wedding. We'd both been placed at the same table, not sure if Joe had truly meant to be so evil, or if it were from good intentions. We'd spent most of the evening having pleasant conversations. We'd both been stuck at the Single's Table, and the only ones who were older than sixteen and younger than sixty-five. After several songs played, Ranger turned in his chair and made eye contact.

"Would you like to dance? You've been staring at the couples for some time now. I may not be up to date with the latest music, but I promise I'm not a terrible dancer." He'd asked in jest and a part of me wanted to scream, "YES, YES, PLEASE DANCE WITH ME!" but I knew that being so close to him and being held by him, would be the hardest thing to walk away from. I smiled softly before declining.

"Maybe another time. I'm not feeling this music tonight. Why don't you go find another woman? Any of them here would break my leg at the opportunity to dance with you." The hardest part of the evening had been him nodding silently and leaving the table to find someone to dance with.

_So far away but still so near  
The lights go on, the music dies  
But you don't see me standing here  
I just came to say goodbye_

I watched as he danced with several of the gorgeous women who had stared daggers at me all evening. I had to force myself to tear my eyes away and stared dumbly at my hands. Knowing that I'd turned down Ranger was the dumbest move I'd ever made, and I was kicking myself for it. But deep down inside, I knew that If I'd accepted his offer, that when he let me go at the end of the evening, I would feel more alone than I already did._  
_


End file.
